I Fell Madly in Love with a Mormon in the Mexican Riviera

It was something kind of animalistic at first sight.
Not all of them are cut out to be how they are portrayed in those commercials for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints.
You wouldn't believe...
He was, however, from Utah.
We first met in the Aquarius Dining Room aboard the Vision of the Seas.
An "exotic" fruit plate, some escargot, and slice of flourless chocolate cake later we were wondering around the cruise ship looking for somewhere we could find some seclusion--a place to ourselves. This continued for the remainder of the cruise.
Him with his piercing deep blue eyes and dirty blond hair. His body was lean and muscular from playing rugby and lacrosse. He held me close to him as we both gazed down at the water rushing past the ship from below.
We did everything together minus the drugs minus the alcohol, but before I go any further...

...most of this did not happen.

His family did favor it though as made evident in one of our conversations at the dining table.
Mormon Father: So, Michelle, do you have a boyfriend? Planning on getting married anytime soon?
Me: Are you serious? Really?
(silence)
Me: Well, I'm planning on getting married in my thirties after I'm settled for the most part.
Mormon Mother: Smart girl.
Me: In regards to your first question. No and that's all I'm going to say about that.
...
Mormon Father: Usually when we go on these things. Brenan and Wes pair up with nice girls for the rest of the cruise...

I had also scored major points with the Mormon family because:

1. They were able to recognize that I'm awesome.
   
2. One evening, I wore a luchador mask at the dining table showing that I am a good sport.
3. I have a very nice family, hence I myself will also create a nice family.
   

Reason two is the main source of point earnage.

Brenan, the boy my age did have piercing blue eyes, dirty blonde hair, and a slender athletic body. He did play lacrosse and rugby. He spent the last two years of his life in Japan teaching English. And he showed traces of having an Asian fettish so those are easy points for me.

So, I guess the easy question is: why didn't I take him with me to a stateroom and hump his leg already?

Well, for one, I was rooming with my brother but mainly it was because we didn't click. Aside from the interesting things I had already mentioned he wasn't really all that interesting. All details put aside: I just wasn't that attracted to him. He was really nice though.

And so with the cruise coming to an close, Brenan and I ended our relationship with a simple but firm handshake.

And that, as they say, is that...for now anyways.